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By Sam Fulwood III
Cleveland Plain Dealer
Nov. 19, 2005
I can't stop thinking about Natasha Webb-Prather's question.
Natasha is the 16-year-old student at Shaw High School's Leadership Academy whom I mentioned in Thursday's column. She stumped a panel of writers and scholars with a simple question: Why don't black boys consider it cool to be smart?
Common wisdom blames hip-hop music and thuggish ghetto culture for devaluing education among young black men. They seem to lurk on every inner-city street corner but aren't as often found sitting in high school classrooms or walking into university libraries.
Not every black boy rejects a life of the mind or seeks fast times and quick money on drug-infested streets. That we don't see as many black boys studying to become accountants, engineers and even journalists doesn't mean they don't exist. It only means we don't see them.
The lack of visibility is the beginning of the answer to Natasha's question. Those good but invisible men are as much to blame as the over-glamorized thugs and gangstas for creating a false impression of all black men.
It's well past time for the decent, hard-working, family-raising black men to demand their due respect. Sure, it might be cool to be 50 Cent, but it's also cool - and a lot easier - to be 50 Cent's attorney or doctor.
If for no other reason, successful black men owe it to black women to step into the limelight. By remaining in the shadows, they make it difficult for black girls (and women) to believe that a good man will one day be available as a boyfriend or husband.
Of course, bad boys have always been more popular with the girls than good guys. This isn't new and it's definitely not just a black thing.
So much of American popular culture is the romanticized story of bad boys and the women who love them. Think of the tough-talking gangsters portrayed by James Cagney more than half a century ago or leather-jacketed James Dean in the 1950s or Francis Ford Coppola's "Godfather" movies.
Americans - blacks, whites and others - have a love-hate relationship with bad boys. The badder the better, one middle-age woman told me recently.
And this is why I can't stop thinking about Natasha.
I wasn't on the panel, so I didn't have to answer her question when she posed it. But as she spoke, I flashed back to my high school days.
I wore thick glasses to read the print in even thicker books. Excellent grades couldn't compensate for a lack of a vertical jump. I didn't cuss, drink or cut classes. I was editor of the school newspaper and in the Drama Club.
Call me a nerd; many of my classmates did. The worst among them were the coolest and prettiest black girls, who seemed to have the best times with the dumbest of the bad boys.
Peer approval seems to be everything when you're in high school. But that's a short spell in the span of a lifetime.
Natasha needs to believe that if she continues to move in the right direction, she will attract the black boys (and, later, black men) who are her equals.
And the black boys must understand something, too.
It might seem cool now to strike an indifferent pose, but if you live long enough you'll feel differently about school and studying.
You'll know exactly when that day arrives. Girls like Natasha will have become women who are strong enough to tell you that your wasted life just ain't cool enough for them.
Cleveland Plain Dealer
Nov. 19, 2005
I can't stop thinking about Natasha Webb-Prather's question.
Natasha is the 16-year-old student at Shaw High School's Leadership Academy whom I mentioned in Thursday's column. She stumped a panel of writers and scholars with a simple question: Why don't black boys consider it cool to be smart?
Common wisdom blames hip-hop music and thuggish ghetto culture for devaluing education among young black men. They seem to lurk on every inner-city street corner but aren't as often found sitting in high school classrooms or walking into university libraries.
Not every black boy rejects a life of the mind or seeks fast times and quick money on drug-infested streets. That we don't see as many black boys studying to become accountants, engineers and even journalists doesn't mean they don't exist. It only means we don't see them.
The lack of visibility is the beginning of the answer to Natasha's question. Those good but invisible men are as much to blame as the over-glamorized thugs and gangstas for creating a false impression of all black men.
It's well past time for the decent, hard-working, family-raising black men to demand their due respect. Sure, it might be cool to be 50 Cent, but it's also cool - and a lot easier - to be 50 Cent's attorney or doctor.
If for no other reason, successful black men owe it to black women to step into the limelight. By remaining in the shadows, they make it difficult for black girls (and women) to believe that a good man will one day be available as a boyfriend or husband.
Of course, bad boys have always been more popular with the girls than good guys. This isn't new and it's definitely not just a black thing.
So much of American popular culture is the romanticized story of bad boys and the women who love them. Think of the tough-talking gangsters portrayed by James Cagney more than half a century ago or leather-jacketed James Dean in the 1950s or Francis Ford Coppola's "Godfather" movies.
Americans - blacks, whites and others - have a love-hate relationship with bad boys. The badder the better, one middle-age woman told me recently.
And this is why I can't stop thinking about Natasha.
I wasn't on the panel, so I didn't have to answer her question when she posed it. But as she spoke, I flashed back to my high school days.
I wore thick glasses to read the print in even thicker books. Excellent grades couldn't compensate for a lack of a vertical jump. I didn't cuss, drink or cut classes. I was editor of the school newspaper and in the Drama Club.
Call me a nerd; many of my classmates did. The worst among them were the coolest and prettiest black girls, who seemed to have the best times with the dumbest of the bad boys.
Peer approval seems to be everything when you're in high school. But that's a short spell in the span of a lifetime.
Natasha needs to believe that if she continues to move in the right direction, she will attract the black boys (and, later, black men) who are her equals.
And the black boys must understand something, too.
It might seem cool now to strike an indifferent pose, but if you live long enough you'll feel differently about school and studying.
You'll know exactly when that day arrives. Girls like Natasha will have become women who are strong enough to tell you that your wasted life just ain't cool enough for them.
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Unsu...
There was an excellent editorial in Saturday's NY Times. The title was "Got Each Other's Backs, or Holding Each Other Back?"
It discusses a study performed by Roland Fryer which speaks to the question "if a black student does well in school, will his black friends accuse him of 'acting white'?"
The study shows that "acting white" seems to be a real problem, but not one affecting all minority students.
And the trend is much more pronounced in integrated schools.
The paper (results of the study) may be obtained here:
post.economics.harvard.edu/facu....html
Its very well-written.
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"Interesting"again,institutionalized seperating and manipulating of powers.I must say in all honesty i skipped most of the algebra,30 some years after...
I was going to say before reading the study(post.economics.harvard.edu.facu) that the parent(s) probably realize that they(the students/children) know the 50 percent guys and gals who "look"so bad-as in B-boy or
whatever the latest wording of that phenomena is,are entertainers and usually well-educated performers with a talent.
Unless it's the same as the "good" examples("positive"performers,sports,etc.that are as well overpaid),wich are overrated in this society where wages are low for those that keep the world going/do menial work and over-achievement is a requirement to/equals success in life.
Preferably not geeky and certainly 'gorgeous'.
That seems to be one side i thought about.It doesn't seem to be consistant with the other that some youth feel they need to belong or create their"own"('acting black'as opposed to "acting"white )reality as projected by the media.
It's the problem i have with a series like the new "gay/black"one that recently started.Is it a positive rolemodel"We should be happy they show this/we didn't have this before"or another unrealistic "realism"that seems so popular and unobtainable?
A good read indeed as it raises questions,not about the parent(s), student(s)or educators but a bigger,unjust,picture.
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Interesting topic.
The invisibility of "good black men" doesn't appear to be for reasons that we are really in control of, it's just the way things are.
Perhaps it's the standard of what makes a successful man that needs examning too.
For me, success has to do with self-realization and finding one's place in the world.
I was born in South Central LA, went to inner city schools until I was fortunate enough to recieve a scholarship to a very exclusive, college prep high school in Claremont, CA.
I wasn't too nerdy or too hip, just your average kid who wanted acceptance. What I found was a world of loneliness -- I could hang with anyone, regardless of skin color or cultural background, but I was definately in the one-of-a-kind club.
I don't think it was a bad thing. I learned to find my own way in life, and now enjoy a world view that excludes no one based on their background or appearance.
In short, I found a place that now allows me to decide what is important, and what I want. I can be comfortable in pretty much any setting.
As to what people feel makes a successful person, I feel that if you rely on other's definitions of what success is, you will never really obtain it.
I feel successful, even if my bank account doesn't have a lot of zeros behind another integer. I am not hidden, as I am all over town and very much in the public view. I think that I can be invisible, however, but this just has to do with what others choose to see.
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"The lack of visibility is the beginning of the answer to Natasha's question. Those good but invisible men are as much to blame as the over-glamorized thugs and gangstas for creating a false impression of all black men."
"If for no other reason, successful black men owe it to black women to step into the limelight. By remaining in the shadows, they make it difficult for black girls (and women) to believe that a good man will one day be available as a boyfriend or husband."
Ok, I take hard core exception to that. I stepped into the limelight as a "proper" speaking black man who studied English, Spanish and Japanese in high school. What did I get for stepping into the limelight? An immediate eruption of hostilities by fellow students who thought I was uncool.
The next time I even got close enough to kiss a black woman was 10 years later. White women had no problem kissing me (or more than that *ahem*) at all. Black women? LOL. In the 16 single years of my life since that day I said I was learning Japanese, I have experienced solid, irrefutable proof that black women, except for 2 women (and the sista I married), absolutely no not respect intelligence over thug appeal. I've been there, as a black man. And I'm no loser - I had plenty of attention coming from non-black women.
I'm not telling the rest of you that it's hell, but it was for me. And the black women rushing in here now to tell me that I'm wrong? Well that's why you don't see us intelligent men. You don't realize what we're going through and your actions say you don't care. I really, really don't understand why you complain about the lack of good men, when if we really did avoid white women, we'd be single 30something virgins waiting for you to see us. By then, of course, you'll have had your bad boy kids, and we'll be stuck with raising someone else's progeny (and none of our own). Talk about kicking the intelligent black man down and beating him with Darwin's Stick!
It certainly was not my fault that I got kicked out of the limelight by black women and brought into the white women's limelight.
Intelligent black men are and always will be the social underclass in black America.
Anyone who disagrees with me, look how they portrayed Steve Urkel. Mike Tyson gets more respect than he did.
This article absolutely galls me to say that we good black men owe black women anything. We don't. I certainly do not owe black women anything. For one, I've sacrificed ***16 YEARS*** of my life trying to settle down with a black woman who actually acted like she felt that intelligence is better than thug appeal. What is owed here is an explanation from black women why they can't find the good black men - or, more honestly, why they turned us down and then got mad when the white women rescued us from being 30/40 year old virgins waiting for sistas to finally "discover" us.
But then there's another problem. You don't dare ask a sista to account for her own actions, unless you like getting your keyboard burned off... or your face, in person. It's always the man's fault. Aghhh, the arrogance. *rolls eyes*
And yes, I am married to a black woman. I gave sistas **that much patience**. Natasha is an anomaly - an anomaly like the fine lady I'm married to. I wish Natasha were the norm, but given the lack of respect blacks still have for intellectuals, it's obvious she is not.
Man, this frustrates me. -
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Unsu...
I hear/feel your frustration!
I agree with you but high-school is the biggest piece of shit in the United States.
With exceptions, its glorified baby-sitting. Everyone is dangerously immature and culturally ignorant, so to base opinions or characterizations on those who haven't transcended those experiences is a bit short. The true sadness is that this the defining experience for too many people in the Black community.
I would agree with everything you said if you replaced "Black women" with "poor, uneducated women, operating in culturally-bankrupt environments." That's a mouthful but that's what it is. Chickens have come home to roost.
I don't believe I have issues with women of any race or ethnic background. I too have felt the same sort of thing described above and I too have had long periods of time pass in between dating Black women. The funny thing is I met a Black woman last year and we got pretty close. All the stuff I was thinking and feeling about Black women was shared by her but about Black men. It was pretty wild in that we couldn't believe others like us existed. (Not that we're special, but because of the lack of encounters.) The one thing we had in common was that, when we were kids and teenagers, we realized that the environment in which we lived was seriously messed up. Not our individual families, but the broader community.
Individually, we have no obligation to Black women. However, I do believe that as a people, the positive faces need to be highlighted as well. We should all do our part to aid in the service of those who are in need.
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We OWE it to others to step into the limelight?
Excuse me, but black society was the one that punished us for doing so.
This article is irresponsible and cowardly. It refuses to address the wholescale rejection of decent black men by black women and the black community at large.
***The article shoots itself in the foot by admitting that bad boys are more popular then good boys, and then refusing to call women out for making this so true.***
We step into the limelight, we get jeered and made fun of, and romantically driven off to women of other races - it's either white women or involuntary celibacy for the bookworm brotha.
I did not see Natasha at the chess club. Where was Natasha? Oh yeah, she wasn't in the limelight, either.
